Saturday, 1 October 2011

Vernon 'Oh God make it stop' Little

The Book: Vernon God Little by DBC Pierre

The Review: "Reading this book made me think of how the English language was in Shakespeare's day, enormously free and inventive and very idiomatic and full of poetry as well"

The Reviewer: John Carey, Chair of the Booker Judges

The verdict: Ah, yes, John Carey must be thinking of that original version of Hamlet where every third word was "fucken" and Laertes blew smoke up Horatio's arsehole.

Saturday, 10 September 2011

Healthy appetite

The Book: The Jane Austen Book Club by Karen Joy Fowler

The Review: "If I could eat this novel, I would."

The Reviewer: Alice Sebold, author of The Lovely Bones

The Verdict: This is a bit like when people say a baby is so cute they could "eat them up" - a bit twisted really. What's worrying is that Alice Sebold is a very talented writer herself, and yet there were no other quotes from her review good enough to go on the cover of this novel? You could say that should have been a warning to me not to read this book.
I did not heed this warning; you should.

Monday, 5 September 2011

A great Christmas present, but don't propose with it.

The Book: Assassin's Apprentice by Robin Hobb.

The Review: "In today's crowded fantasy market Robin Hobb's books are like diamonds in a sea of zircons."

The Reviewer: George RR Martin
The Verdict: After approximately 240 pages of scene setting, there is a well constructed, entertaining plot. It does not rise above the level of a good fantasy novel, however.

Monday, 29 August 2011

You Don't Love This Book Yet

The Book: You Don't Love Me Yet by Jonathan Lethem
(the third trendy Jonathan, after Franzen and Safran Foer, before Tropper)

The Review: "A gentle and hip romantic comedy . . . Witty and charming, You Don't Love Me Yet breezes through LA's iconoclastic anonymity with a refreshing sincerity."

The Reviewer: James Urquhart, The Independent

The Verdict: Allow me to translate.

"A gentle and hip romantic comedy . . . breezes" = Disposable

"Witty and charming" = Trying to be witty and charming

"LA's iconoclastic anonymity" = The characters are taken from a checklist of hipster stereotypes and you are given no reason to care about any of them.

"Refreshing sincerity" = Can only be facetious. At least the jacket blurb indicated how contrived the whole thing is when it invoked "delicious echoes of Jane Austen's Emma". (There aren't any delicious echoes of Austen.)

Lethem hints at some interesting questions regarding authorship, conceptual art, criticism and success. Like diamond earrings lost at the end of Glastonbury, if you want to dig through all of the hipster effluent, they're yours.


Monday, 25 July 2011

DANGER: Read This Book At Your Peril

The Book: Game of Thrones by George RR Martin

The Quote: "I read my eyes out"

The Reviewer: Anne McCaffrey

The Verdict: It wasn't until I was halfway through the book that I noticed this quote at which point I became distinctly worried. There was still too much I wished to read. I'm too young to lose my sight.

Having now finished the book i'm happy to say that while I enjoyed it immensely I did not 'read my eyes out'. There is still 5 books to go however . . .

Monday, 18 July 2011

Less effort, please

The Book: The Stone Diaries by Carol Shields

The Quote: "If this does not win the Booker Prize for Fiction it will be because it is too good."

The Reviewer: Scotland on Sunday

The Verdict: Ah ok, Carol can rest assured that that is the reason she didn't win then - must try not as hard next time Carol!
I wonder what Roddy Doyle, author of Paddy Clarke Ha Ha Ha - which actually did win the 1993 Booker prize that Carol Shields was shortlisted for - would have to say about this speculation.

Friday, 8 July 2011

Come Again?

The Book: Vernon God Little by DBC Pierre

The Review: "You want to know what this terrific book is like?  It's like the Osbournes invited the Simpsons round for a root beer, and Don DeLillo dropped by to help them write a new song for Eminem."

The Reviewer: Andrew O'Hagan

The Verdict: What? I mean really, what? If you do want to know what this fantastic, Booker prize winning, novel is like I suggest ignoring this trippy outburst from Andrew O'Hagan and simply picking up the novel.  Afterall, it's like Holden Caulfield and Jack Kerouac are trapped in a Hunter S. Thompson novel by Skeletor, or something like that!